The large featherless being here….
One of the (many) best perks of being personal assistant to a VIP client with feathers is nonstop opportunities to learn.
Now we are delighted to announce Pearl has opened up the Q&A line to YOU, his VIP fans!
Ask him anything – we guarantee you he has an answer!
To submit your questions: email@example.com
This week’s question comes from a single manbird.
I’ve noticed the ladybirds really seem to fancy you. I’ve been trying to attract a ladybird to my nest without success. Can you help me out?
a single & seeking manly manbird
Dear Single & Seeking,
When you are trying to attract a ladybird, you have to show her the “whole package.” Not only must you look your manliest, feathery-est best, but you must show her you have what it takes to provide her with the poshest, comfiest nest and the most vigilant nest-side security.
Once you do this, you too will have ladybirds flocking to you.
With love (& feathers),
….as dictated to his large featherless press secretary
p.s. Remember, you can submit your own questions for Pearl by sending them to: firstname.lastname@example.org (all questions are answered in the order they are received)